We Grumpy's, naturally, respect everybody's personal needs, desires, views and convictions. However, we don't feel anybody has the right to expect the cost related to loony or unreasonable views/convictions to be born by those who don't share them. So, immediately after having seized power, we're going to delight everybody, by introducing our slightly controversial new You-Want-It-You-Pay-For-It initiative. A Register will be kept that will contain the names of those who have volunteered to personally pay all direct and indirect costs associated with the introduction of their loony views/convictions. To ensure their name appears in the Register volunteers have merely to complete a simple form authorizing the Grumpy Team to periodically transfer unlimited sums of money from their personal bank account into the Grumpy's totally non-transparent Lichtenstein-based You-Want-It-You-Pay-For-It escrow account.
Those featured in the Register will be absolutely delighted because they can claim for themselves the exclusive right and privilege of continuing to financially support their goofy views/convictions for the rest of their lives. The majority will be delighted because it won’t cost them a penny and, chances are, all deeply held loony views/convictions will become infinitely less deeply held immediately it becomes apparent that those who support them will have to pay for them.
