Work-shy spongers, louts, villains, juvenile snots, addicts, perverts, homicidal maniacs and minority groups with vested interests are entitled to be on the receiving end of more rights and freedoms than decent hardworking folk. Bollocks!

The Problem – One might be forgiven for thinking the European Court of Human Rights to have been a cunningly orchestrated wheeze dreamt up and underwritten by fat-fingered lawyers in order to trouser vast sums of money. Or perhaps it was the brain child of work-shy spongers, villains, minority interest groups etc eager to submit spurious claims and make off with monumental sums of money and/or gain concessions likely to irritate decent hardworking folk. Either way, lawyers and their clients are blatantly using and abusing our hard won rights and freedoms.

And the Apathetic Majority are letting them get away with it.

The Grumpy’s Solution – Immediately after seizing power we'll be introducing a slightly controversial new No Rights For Those Who Haven't Earned Them initiative.

The Grumpy Team will, of course, decide who has and who hasn't earned them.

All decent hardworking folk will automatically qualify. Work-shy parasites, louts, recidivists, juvenile snots, villains etc will, after having experienced our ever-so-caring but totally merciless new regime of fear, pain, terror, deprivation and death, be eager to qualify. Greedy lawyers, politicians, bureaucrats, City executives and the Lying Mad-Dog Media will struggle to make the grade. Filthy swine who are cruel to animals will, of course, never get to qualify.

Very greedy lawyers who attempt to make spurious or unreasonable Human Rights claims on behalf of their clients will be rushed to one of the Grumpy's politically incorrect Subterranean Centres of Excellence for observation/therapy.